Wow, fantastic baby

Never saw it coming but I'm becoming a fan of Big Bang after they released their new songs. Especially Blues, currently fucking in love with it. Don't really like Fantastic Baby's mv BUT it's a good club/dance track. Anyway, TOP's handsome as hell in his mint blue hair hehe boom shakala wow fantastic baby ~ ^^ 

Deep in your eyes

Too many things, too many decisions to be made, too many what ifs. I still feel so lost, though I guess I'll just have to listen to the same advices given. Maybe because I'm really scared to face another failure. And I'm scared I'll take what is actually my prority now for granted. Or that I missed my chance. Even though nothing has started yet, I'm already feeling that I need a break from everything.
At times like these, sometimes I wish that for once I can just grab a pack, sit somewhere alone with a drink and fucking compose myself. But no I know I can never do that, because I'm so fucking dependent and I hate being alone. Sigh.  

Blues

Strength is nothing more than how well you hide your pain and insecurities. Nothing more than how well you act like you don't care when actually you might be dying inside.You start to hide so well that you become what you pretend to be, building up a tough wall around you and all. So that the more you're hurt or the more you're judged, the less you'll feel. People might and will tell you, how you've become so heartless, when in fact it's just that you've learnt to use your heart less. But still, sometimes don't you find that it just gets so hard and tiring being strong?

The kings

Ss4 on 18 Feb's night was fucking mindblowing, needless to say SJ's concerts are the best. How I hate SM for designing the stage with gaps from the audience(Ss3's stage was with no gaps and way closer) which of course meant alot lesser interactions, and the bloody strict security ....... I don't know is it because we were sitting at arena seats or what that the security is more strict than the rest of the areas but I'm so fucking sad and angry because I didn't manage to take a single photo of them(except the first photo, the rest are official photos) ughhhh!! At least Ryeowook took a polaroid with us and Donghae smiled straight at us, so better than nothing I guess hehehe. So anyway we had a superb time, and made new friends as well ! Ohhh and I realised this time round there are actually more guys attending the concert, SJ's attraction is endless keke. Regretted like fuck for not buying the second show's tickets, and actually frantically tried to find all night and morning but it was of no use. So if there's SS4 in Malaysia, we're so gonna be there, that is of course if the timing is suitable. Actually I'm like tempted to go for Thailand's next month but cannot lehhhh. And I seriously need to save up so that hopefully we can go to Seoul at the end of this year  ~ ^^ Anyway, really gonna miss Leeteuk, this might be the last time(if no ss4 in Malaysia) we see him until he finishes the two years of army :'(

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Have been pestering my mom again recently to send me to the States for uni instead, but she's still not agreeing to it, not even a teeny bit. Omg how can I actually convince her?!